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Shadow Work: Beginning Meditation


It’s a feeling that is heard. It is not a sound that is heard. It is a feeling that is felt, it is not something that pops in your head. How we have been wired, it makes listening a little extra confusing and makes it challenging to sort out what is what. A forced thought can be and feel very similar to what we are feeling or what we need to be listening to. At some moments, both are accurate in the same manner. They are very very close to each other. They feel and sound very similar to each other. It’s the very small details that separate them in the beginning.


While doing this work, you really have to learn and be familiar with what is you and what is beyond you. All of it is coming from you but something is coming from beyond.Part of your higher self. Your higher self and your subconscious are the same, yet very different. They seem to be in the same realm but are very far apart. Your subconscious can bring in these forced thoughts making it more difficult to decipher which is which.


In the beginning stages, one needs to become familiar first with the body and be grounded. Be familiar with the ground, with the water, with the air, with the fire that is internal to you. Meditating in the bath really helps. Something about the feeling of hot water helps separate different feelings of being grounded. Same with the humidity around you. 


After closing your eyes, and taking 3 deep breaths. In the beginning stages of this work, just notice the taste of the air if any, feel the humidity, any smells that are in the air. Feel that humidity though. Feel it as it enters your body in all your passages into your lungs. Feel it in your lungs. As you get more familiar with that feeling to where you can actually focus so far as to feel your lungs, you can feel the humidity soak up anything in your body it needs to soak up. That could be a particular energy, toxins, you can start to put your racing thoughts in there. As you breathe out, focus on the sound, Focus on how your body moves within the water. 


The water is very important here. It helps separate different pieces of your body. The buoyancy in your body will help you feel and recognize your organs and other things inside of you. Your body will float up and down inside the water as you breathe. That creates more sensations. The feel of hot water moving on different parts and more sensitive parts. It will amaze you what will seem to be more sensitive than normal. While emerging in the start of your meditation, you need to be aware of your body. Start at your toes, feel them become aware. As you become aware, there is a type of tingling sensation you will start to feel. As you follow it up to your shins, your knees, the rest of your legs, every part, follow the flow of that energy. If it slows or stops for a moment, take that time to recognize whatever part of the body that is, and recognize how you feel when that does happen.


All your doing here is just feeling and taking a mental note of how you feel. Follow that flow all the way up through every part of your body past your head and out of your crown. You may continue to breathe here during and after. Feel the water, feel the bottom of the bathtub. Notice any smells or sounds around you. Pay attention to how they change or what can be a surprise sound. Having this in your mind will limit distractions during your meditation practice. Notice any change in temperature to your body in different areas. Your body will get used to the changes and the differences. Once you are aware of your body and it feels, and how you feel, your body should start to relax if it hasn’t already. That buoyancy will start to change and start to feel different. Almost think of it as having some water weight.  Not to be confused at all on what you are actually feeling. This is only simply a metaphor.


As your body relaxes your mind will start to as well. But it feels like your mind might be racing. So many thoughts, emotions. It’s chaotic there. Sometimes there are things you can do about it, and sometimes there is not. In the beginning stages of this work, it is possible to surrender to those feelings and thoughts. Let them run rampant, but don’t let one particular thought take too much time. If it lingers, shift your attention to the million other things going on in your head. By surrendering to them, they will slowly start to deplete. They may never go away. In this stage that is okay. Don’t beat yourself up. The first few sessions you do with yourself might just be practicing quieting your mind. Learning how to get it to that meditative state. Even getting a part of it to quiet, will help you learn. It will help you relax and trust me, you will feel much better on a general level.


Once one is aware of their body and their mind in an honest and truthful way, you can imagine you. You are floating in space. You might even see the stars. Embrace their beauty. Embrace the beauty that is you floating in space. Notice all the things that make you, you. Emotions, thought processes, those things can actually be seen here instead of felt or heard. It’s like you are looking at yourself in a whole different way. Notice this, process this. Take a mental note of this for this is super important in work to come. 



Notice a giant ball of fire in the center of your chest. It’s super bright, and you can feel the power of it. Keep in mind you are looking at yourself here. You are looking at yourself from almost a 3rd person point of view floating across from yourself, but as you are, you are much smaller than the you, you are looking at. That ball of light is a ball of fire. Burning efficiently. You may see some dark smoke coming out the top of yourself like a chimney, but it is not excessive. It is efficient burning. Once that energy is felt, it is seen without distraction, Notice it. Surrender to it. This is the fire that is burning to keep you going. Physically, Mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. It is a massive and super impressive ball of fire. Your internal fire.


As your mind is busy, as you have anxiety, depression. You can see all the words around you going crazy. Floating rushing. Your thoughts will take a word form that you can see. You can see your thoughts. Watch them flow into the fire, watch as the fire itself changes to burning more efficiently. As those words and thoughts go into that fire, you are feeding it. You are feeding it to burn more efficiently so that it can turn that energy into another form to bring silence and comfort into your psyche. Into your space that you are floating in. This whole area you can see, feel, hear and see, it is the inside of you. You are inside of your body, your mind, your brain. That fire will stop smoking when those things burn inside of it. It will have no waste. That internal fire that we all have uses every part of this fuel to create a new energy that is useful, helpful, positive, and comfortable. The almighty power.


This will also help your mind slow down and you should notice, those thoughts and words are gone. The chaos has diminished.  The mind is now quiet and close to a true meditative state. As this happens, we fall farther into mediation. We have to surrender to that in order to start listening. To start determining what is felt, what is heard. To determine what all the different feelings and sounds are. To separate ourselves from our higher selves and the universe. 

Notice the little things. The details in words, thoughts and feelings. Notice when you start to tell yourself something or a thought enters your brain that has been on your mind in a particular subject or something you have been thinking of for a while.


As I stated earlier, the messages will come as feelings rather than actual words or thoughts. Almost as they just appear when you are not paying attention. You might feel like your in a sleep mode or a turned off mode while you are feeling these things. Some might wake up a little bit and your thoughts might start racing again within this subject. It takes discipline but you need to regroup and get back in that deep meditative state. It can be as easy as just sitting back and telling yourself you are listening. And actually listen. Let those thoughts and subjects pass. Determine if there is anything in those thoughts you need to listen to. A repetition of a thought or a phrase is a great example of this. Something that repeats over and over and over again. They will more often than not correlate with what is being felt.


One of the biggest parts while you are in a meditative state is to listen. Make sure you are listening. There is no need to question what I need to listen to. Just listen to everything around you. Feeling your body, senses, and paying deep attention to everything going on is listening. It sounds hard as I explain it, but I assure you, once you start listening, it’s surely not as difficult as you thought. 


Keep in mind, When you fall into deep meditation, it takes steps to come back out of it. If you come out too fast it can hurt you physically and mentally. Take your time waking yourself up. Your body and mind will know when it is time. You will start to come more present into reality. Instead of forcing your body and mind up, start at your toes and feel them, wiggle them. Feel that same flowing energy work it’s way up into your entire body. Become present with your surroundings, your senses and the world you are in. Don’t move around too fast after this. Take time to process the meditation to think. There is no rush here, listen to yourself and wake up gradually as needed.


I want to share a few more things about meditation that can be very helpful to you in your practice and shadow work as you develop. One of those is discovering and being familiar with your energy and power. Getting familiar with what it feels like. Embrace it, learn how it flows and learn how to play with it a little. Also become familiar with how your physical body feels. Use this time to get to know yourself. The little ticks the body has, the little pains. Feel your lungs flil with air, feel your heartbeat. Some even go as far as feeling their toenails and their hair follicles. Pay attention to these things. Learning who you are, what you feel like, how you work, It will be very beneficial for your work to come. To separate out you and what you need to be listening to.


 

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